


The Omamori Charm

by HarkaSun



Series: 5 Months of Shadowhunters Challenge [4]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec Lightwood Loves Magnus Bane, Canon Compliant, Domestic Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, M/M, Magnus Bane Has Panic Attacks, Magnus Bane's Omamori Charm, Panic Attacks, Protective Alec Lightwood, malec husbands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:34:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24287452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HarkaSun/pseuds/HarkaSun
Summary: When Magnus experiences attacks of fear or panic, terrors of his past overwhelming his mind, the omamori charm and his husband are there to ground him.
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Series: 5 Months of Shadowhunters Challenge [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1696138
Comments: 9
Kudos: 140
Collections: Favorite Malec Stories, Malec Hurt/Comfort Anthology





	The Omamori Charm

**Author's Note:**

> For @izzymalec and @permetstu‘s 5 months of Shadowhunters Challenge on Tumblr.
> 
> Week 7: object  
> ↳ The Omamori Charm

“Magnus!”

The voice was a slit of light in the swell of darkness. The air hit him in a gasp, the force of it tearing at his lungs and making him clutch at his chest and his throat. The void was crushing into him.

Hands grabbed him through the dark and he thrashed and fought them off in panic, terror gripping his heart. His hand was successfully held, however, and something was thrust against his palm, his fingers forced to close over it.

“Talk. What do you feel?”

Magnus shook his head, trying to pull away, heaving for breath. “No,” he gasped, struggling to escape the hand closed over his own. “No—”

“Magnus, move your fingers. What’s in your hand? Tell me what it feels like.”

Magnus frowned, hesitantly did as he was told. His shaking fingers clenched around the item in his hand. It was soft and silken, with raised patterns of thread upon the surface. Something like rope was near the top, swirled in a looped pattern.

“It’s…” he began, gasped for breath. “It’s silk.”

“Good. What else?”

Magnus gasped, fought and failed to heave air into his lungs. “I—I can’t… breathe…”

“Focus. In and out. Breathe in for me. Deep breath. Think about what you’re feeling in your hand. I want you to describe it to me.”

There was a hand on Magnus’s chest now, the other tightening on his upper arm. The warmth was seeping to his skin, a bare palm upon his bicep and another over the fabric of his vest top, pushed against his chest like it was trying to force breaths. Magnus hated it, but it was working.

“Good, Magnus. You’re doing so good. Keep breathing just like that. Can you open your eyes? Look at what’s in your hand.”

Magnus swallowed hard, prised his eyes open. It was disjointed and blurry and he blinked hard.

“It’s… red,” he said through shaky breaths, struggling to force his chest to rise and fall deeper. “Gold…”

A kiss pressed to his temple and Magnus breathed a little easier, blinking hard as he stared down at the object in his hand. His fingers curled tighter around it. The silk was cool and soft against his skin. The red fabric was smattered in gold and pink with a coil of white rope upon a patch of green.

“Alec,” he said shakily, clutching the charm tight in his hand.

“I’m here, sweetheart. I’m right here with you.”

Magnus lifted his head to see the shadowhunter knelt at his side. He was dressed down in a white t-shirt and black sweatpants. The lights were warm and ambient around him, casting Alec’s face in gentle shades. They were in the kitchen; Magnus’s back was against the side of the stone island.

“What happened?” Magnus asked, swallowed hard.

Alec gave him a look that was becoming far too familiar, a look of sympathy and softness. “You had an attack, Magnus. I—I think you must’ve blacked out for a moment.” He stroked a hand across Magnus’s shoulder. “Are you okay?”

Magnus nodded, rubbed the charm between his fingers. It wasn’t fair on Alec for him to be so used to dealing with Magnus’s problems. They were fewer and further apart since he and Alec had been married, since they had first met even, but Magnus still experienced odd attacks of panic and crushing fear and, less often, even flashbacks to darker moments from his past.

Sometimes there were triggers, sometimes there weren’t. This was one of those times without. They had just been getting some snacks to settle down with a movie and they had never even made it to the cupboard. Magnus hated the ones without triggers most of all. There was nothing to blame but himself.

Magnus took a deep breath, stared down at the charm in his hands. “Do you remember getting me this?”

Alec gave him a soft smile. “How could I forget?” he murmured, touched the omamori charm in Magnus’s hands. His skin was warm. “It was in Tokyo. You bought that elephant statue and I spent ages looking through these charms trying to find you the perfect one… You were so confused when I gave it to you. I still remember the look on your face.”

Magnus gazed down at it sadly. “I’m sorry about what it has become. It was your first gift to me.”

“And it’s being used perfectly,” assured Alec, stroking a thumb across Magnus’s cheek. “It’s the best thing to ground you when you have an attack. It’s for protection, remember? It protects you. I wish you never had to suffer in the first place, but I am glad you have something to help you.”

Magnus stared up at him. “Alec, _you_ are what helps me.”

Ducking his head slightly, Alec took Magnus’s hand and brought it to his lips, placing a light kiss upon his knuckles. “Let’s get you to the sofa, okay? I’ll get us some snacks and a blanket. Here; let me help you up.”

Nodding slowly, Magnus let his husband pull him to his feet. An arm wrapped around his back, a hand upon his hip, and Alec steered him towards the sofa. Magnus clutched his arm when Alec helped him sit, gazing up at him with soft, sad eyes.

“I love you,” he uttered, leaned his head to Alec’s hand when the shadowhunter touched his cheek. “Stay with me, okay?”

Alec nodded, sat beside Magnus and lifted an arm over his shoulders. The warlock leaned against his side, his head pressed into the gap between Alec’s neck and shoulder. The film was forgotten. His hand was clenched over the omamori charm in his lap. Alec’s hand came to cover his own, the pad of his thumb passing over the silk fabric.

It was the first gift Alec had ever gotten him, but it certainly wasn’t the last. Every birthday and Christmas and anniversary, Alec bought him something from the heart, something important and memorable and Magnus loved him for it. Even without cause or reason, Alec would buy him flowers and chocolates, got Isabelle to advise on makeup brands for him.

It had all started with the omamori charm.

They stayed that way, sat together, curled up on the sofa until Magnus was asleep in Alec’s one-armed embrace. He breathed slowly. Alec turned his face, pressed a light kiss to his brow. Their heads rest against one another.

“I love you too,” Alec murmured.

The omamori charm sits between their palms: a tangible reminder of love held in their joined hands.

**Author's Note:**

> Link to the tumblr post of this fic: https://harkasun.tumblr.com/post/618705857215102976/the-omamori-charm


End file.
